I have a tendency to be a little high-strung. I have spent years being tensed up (which I think may be due to Crohn’s and the fact that I’ve always been worried about “holding things in”) to the point that I don’t really know how to relax. For as long as I remember, I have dealt with stress and worry. One of my biggest issues is not being able to shut off my brain. I am constantly making lists and plans in my head, rehashing a conversation or thinking through one thing or another. It has made it difficult for me to fall asleep on more than a few occasions.
There has never been a good reason for all of this. While I may have some issues that are “stress worthy,” there’s nothing that worrying will help. I’m very aware of this, but that doesn’t make it any easier for me. But I have been trying something a little different recently…
I starting meditating. I realize this sounds very Eastern religiony and perhaps it is, but I, for one, think there are a lot of things that we can learn from other religions. Hinduism focuses on truth and morality and followers put a lot of emphasis on surrendering themselves to something bigger than themselves. Buddhism also stresses morality and promotes awareness, wisdom and understanding. Its founder, Siddhartha, realized that life wasn’t about the things that he had and he sought to be “enlightened” to the real truths of this world. I think these are principles that can make a positive impact in anyone’s life.
But back to the meditation. I have really found it to be very helpful at unwinding and de-stressing. There have been several times where I have been getting frustrated or something starts to bother me, but taking a few minutes to clear my head and focus on breathing and relaxing has helped me regain composure and move past it. Even if it’s only a few minutes, I tend to feel refreshed afterwards and more alert. And sometimes it is nice to spend an even longer time refocusing myself.

I am finding that this is definitely a learned practice. Shutting down your mind – especially one like mine – is not easy. I try to focus on my breathing, often repeating things like “in” and “out” or “1…2” in my head, but my mind still tends to wander. I may also repeat some positive affirmations to help lift my spirits or I spend time praying. I do my best to take control of my thoughts and the moment I find myself wandering off, to bring it back into focus.
The ability to control one’s own mind is a great power. I think it will take much more practice to gain that type of control, but I think it is something that can really make a positive change in my life. I know that stress can lead to a number of physical and mental issues (my Crohn’s has definitely been triggered by stress in the past) and any way to help relieve myself of that pressure can only be a step in the right direction. And just taking the time to step away from the daily noise and distractions reminds me of who I am and why I am here and better prepares me to face whatever comes my way.

“The more man meditates upon good thoughts, the better will be his world and the world at large.”
-Confucius